So yesterday Lauren and I packed up our ‘ponies’ and headed out for a day of schooling at a local hunter show. Now, I showed hunters waaaaay back in the day and was actually really good. I went to state twice and got two firsts and an eleventh. lol. But my 13 year old self still considered that cool. I always rocked it at 4-H shows and hunter circuits However, I grew tired of endless rounds in the ring, snooty, bitchy girls and mothers and the hunter look. With hunters though I found my passion in jumping and I learned how to PUT MY HEELS DOWN! That’s about it.
Anyways, we were entered in the hunter flat class and two jumping classes which were that last 3of the day (27, 28, and 29) and since the show started at nine we decided leaving at 11ish would be good to get the horses settled and warm up. I got up at 7 to braid Yankee (even though it was a schooling show for us and I wasnt taking it seriously, I always braid) and load my two horses up to go to Lauren’s barn. Z was coming so I could shave her fat pony butt.
Got to Lauren’s around 9 and grabbed Z off the trailer and started braiding Patchy- it only took about 20 min, and then we geared up the clippers to shave Z. WELL, she was having none of that. AT ALL. Little brat pony decided to rear up and twist around and about break her little neck. God, bad pony! We had about an hour and a half to kill so we decided to play w/Z a bit. Enjoy the pics…
Z and her new trick
A flying pony!
Well after our pony escapades, we ventured to the show grounds and discovered parking sucks, and I got a wee bit stuck in the wet grass, but WHAT-ERR’.
And then we waited. FOR HOURS. Another reason I remembered why I hate hunters. I got hella burned even though I slathered sun screen on. Which is very unlikke my skin, to burn. See I am, you could say, perpetually tan. I gues SEVEN FREAKING HOURS in the sun will do that to you.
Oh, and when it came time to tack up, my bloody horse kicked me. KICKED me. I couldn’t believe it, my sweet, lovely, gorgeous, tame horse, kiiicked me! With evil in his eyes. I was so taken aback.
Well that was the first of many faux paus. I forgot many things, my belt, my gloves, a hairnet, AND my boots didn’t fit. What a fat ass I am. Now I have to go get them stretched or something. Damn.
Me trying desperately to zip up my boots
So I ran around trying to find boots to wear….no such luck. I tried on like 6 pairs…we ended up vet wrapping them closed. Hot mess.
After those conundrums, we warmed up (too early it turned out) and the horses were gems.
Yankee told me he does NOT enjoy being a hunter. In fact he said “I much prefer running around and being a psycho freak on cross country. What is this trotting slower and not bucking during canter transitions and being told not run like a fool because it reminds me of once long ago when I was a racehorse.” He was displeased but tried his best to behave. He put on his hunter face, and unwillingly calmed his shit down.
So after waiting a while in the hot sun for our classes Lauren and I finally went in to our flat class. I know I was there for ‘shit-and-gigs’ but I still wanted my horse to behave. Lots of people I knew were there and plenty of eventers, AND the judge was my fellow competitor in eventing and previous instructor. I wanted to look calm and collected but I didnt care if we won or not. AMAZINGLY we placed 2nd out of about 12 in the flat class even though he bucked in almost every corner b/c he wanted to race, lol. Race pony brat.
My dressage horse lookin like a spiffy hunter. Weird I know!
Note the Ghetto boots, lol! After that we did our two jumping classes which we TORE around at lighting speed. Yankee said “BOO, these are too tiny to take seriously. I’ll show girl by running like a mad fool between fences.” THANKFULLY our endless dressage schools came in handy and I was always able to bring him back down to a collected canter. We placed 6th in one class cuz I couldnt get him to switch his leads, and 3rd in the other.
WEEE!
"Too easy mom, make harder"
Lauren and Patchy being equally wicked fast as Yankee and I, lol
After all was said and Done I SOMEHOW managed to win grand Champion, very strange considering we didn’t even get a first, but hey I’ll take it seeing as we came just for practice. 7hrs later and one hellava sunburn later (and a few steals from the tack sale-woof boots, scrim sheet, lead rope since Yankee broke his(idiot) and blue stable wraps all for 18 dollars!!!) we packed the horses up and left, satisfied but exhausted.
We need to school a bit of stadium before we head to KY for Spring Run. Fact.
Our unexpected winnings
The Championship ribbon I don't know how I won.