Blog Hop: Fitness

What better way to continue on the new year goal train than to hop on with the rest of my blogging friends! Herro Blog Hop! Theres no better way, actually. Its the best way.

I would like to say however, that I have yet to clean my tack...but thats irrelevant-ish here (THANK YOU for all the WDW responses by the way! So helpful!)

Tracy from Fly On Over was the origin, to my understanding, but I've also read many other posts and felt the urge to join in.

Because accountability.

And since I'm still sore from riding my beast on Tuesday, its safe to say I have fallen off the exercise wagon. HARD.

No one is this happy to work out

Granted, Bacardi was LITERALLY the worst animal in existence on Tuesday, and I am not fucking exaggerating, but I haven't been sore in YEARS from riding. So that was a wake up call.

A picture of us

Could be the twisting, explosions, bucking and rearing fits that had me hanging on for dear, sweet life (thighs of steel yo), but still, sore? From riding? Please.

A couple of posts ago I had admitted that I am the absolute worst at sticking with goals or being motivated. The actual worst. And that is especially true for the gym. No matter how hard I picture an insanely hot, toned bikini body, it cant make me get up at 5AM for more than a few months. No matter how much I know that extra plate will go straight to my ass will prevent me from stuffing my face like a true American glutton. Its a real problem.

There for a while when I began my real person job, I joined a Crossfit gym and woke up regularly at 5am to gym before work. CF was a very love/hate type of relationship. I actually grew to like the cult gym and the CF workouts & learned all "CF talk", even though I wanted to die while doing them. Like I actually prayed my heart would explode so I wouldn't have to be shamed into finishing a WOD. Dont get me started on the PR talks and protein drink obsessions those people have. But seriously, CF was a great kick in the ass and I lost like 9 lbs and got ripped and really strong. And then the holidays came and I stopped going and kept eating because I am a fat fat fatty.

Nothing made me do work like CF though. Nothing. I hated it every fucking second, but the coaches made me do shit and I got shit done. It was an hour of hell, but so worth it. I would really like to go back, actually, because I apparently like to be tortured... but I know getting back into shape is just so painful and I dont wanna *pouty face*. But I also know that I will not make myself do anything at a regular gym. I need my ass kicked.

Luckily, thanks to good genes and a generally good diet, I can get away with sedentary lifestyle in winter. Barely. I definitely am getting some grandma flapper arms and a little more booty in the back.

I say "generally" good diet because on the weekdays I eat so clean its sad. Like, it actually hurts my soul. And I've eaten more plain chicken and veggies than I care to ever eat again. BUT, it is extremely good for you and since my mom is like, the healthiest person alive (not even joking) the worst food we have in the house is canned soup. I was raised on no soda, so I hate it, and barely any bread, cereal, chips or anything bad really ( I DO love carbs though). So 5 days a week I eat really great (a plus when living with the rents) but when The Boy and I get together its a total shitfest. Pizza, burgers, fries and Taco Bell. MMMMMM GET IN ME. Its terrible. We always say "we need to stop eating out", because a) expensive and b) terrible but we cant stop.

Its time.

Riding has usually kept me in pretty good shape, but since its winter and I'm not doing much of that....

My "fitness and health" goals for Feb:
1) Nix alcohol (a thing The Boy and I are trying)
2) Only 2 "eat-out" meals on weekends, the rest need to be groceries. Out of 6 meal possibilities, 2 isn't terrible. Plus I really like pizza, Okay?
3) CF or gym 3x's week MIN. And actually do something at said gym if its not CF. (this will be the hardest)
4) Ride 3x's a week at least, beneficial for everyone

PS I made some changes to my blog again because I have background ADD, let me know if something isnt working. I don't think the mobile app is connected right/ working because its all black on my app. Hopefully its working for y'all

What Do Wednesday: Tack Edition

As we all are well aware, there is not much to do in winter in the ways of riding unless you live in the south (I hate you bitches!). If you're like me, you become a giant slug that doesn't get anything started because why bother.

I decided to put an end to all that because no one likes slugs, especially unproductive ones. So going along with the "New Year" motivation garbage, I made some mini goals for my winter equestrian endeavors, sans riding.

Like making blanket hooks. Check. Clean chicken coop. Check. Organize back half of barn. Check. Organizing feed bins and labeling properly/updating feed list. Check.

#organization

And cleaning tack.

And then I remembered its winter and everything is frozen, including my saddle soaps.

So whilst they're defrosting in my house into a useable consistency I figured I would bang out a post about tack cleaning.

My mind tends to wander endlessly when there are no distractions and so I began to think about my love/hate relationship with cleaning tack.

I rarely do it for one. I am a seriously bad tack whore. I think it stems form the fact that growing up I owned worthless pieces of leather that no amount of cleaning could glamify and no amount of drowning in conditioner could soften. So I just didn't do it.

Enter Pony Club.

We ALL know how that goes. You're basically considered useless if there's a speck of dirt anywhere on you, your tack or your horse. Practically impossible to succeed at any of that and only solidifying that tack cleaning was worthless and futile.

After PC, I continued to not care. I also still owned nothing of worth. Almost all my shit was pleather, including my saddle, so I just hosed it off when it got sweaty. None given.

I think my parents were trying to teach me something by not just giving me everything I wanted, like shiny, soft, pliable, nice leather goods, even though they could easily afford it (thank you rents).... but teenage me hated it.

Then, I tuned 16, my mother was deployed, and she gifted me a drool worthy dressage bridle from GER as apologies for missing such a monumental b-day.

Yankee modeling fancy bridle like a Sir (bridle is 8 yrs old in this pic)

This changed my tack cleaning ways forever. Kind of.

Once I started making my own money and buying nicer pieces of tack, I also took better tried taking better care of it because HOLY GOD was it expensive.

FFW through college and into present day, I now own all mediocre brand, real leather, second hand tack that I love to death but also take TERRIBLE care of. I am the worst.

I don't know why its so hard for me to clean my fucking tack but it is. I put it off. And off and off and off. I HATE sticky fingers and more than normal dirty nails. I despise having to change clothes just to clean tack.  I hate the mess. I hate nasty tack sponges. I hate tack hooks. I hate scrubbing bits. It requires so much effort ...and its just a PITA.

Jesus, what first world problems.

But seriously, my main issue has always been finding a product thats easy to use and does the job. WHAT in the hell do you use? What is best? WHY? WHO KNOWS THESE ANSWERS?!

In college I had a BO who made us clean our tack after every use. She had reallllllly nice leather cleaner from GER, but I could never afford that shit so I just used Leather New. Doesn't do a very good job.

Then I moved barns and it was the dustiest place on earth and cleaning tack was basically pointlesss. So I rarely did.

I dabbled with Horseman's OneStep for a while when I did my semi-annual cleanings, and found I like that best for quick wipe downs but nothing gets tack shinier and cleaner than regular tack soap and water. But then, for crying out loud, you have to condition it too. MANY PRODUCTS. HOW DO. So I just get stuff from TSC and call it a day.

My main WD question is what brand of tack cleaner do you use? AND how often do you clean yours? (And how do you make yourself do it)
Since I haven't cleaned anything of mine since, oh, September, don't feel embarrassed if its equally as shameful. Spill it!! What do?

Feed me your secrets. 

New Beginnings & All That Shit

I guess I've put it off long enough. Its time. Its my birthday, which signifies January is half over and it really is a new year. Time to be an adult and do shit.

2015 goals.

Win all the blues.

I hate doing a goals list. A New Year does not magically freshen up your life and make things a brand new start.

Just...no.

Its simply a continuation of the same life, just with different numbers on your checks and bank statements.

I never make resolutions. I get annoyed when other people do. People rarely keep them. Like I'm glad they're all for bettering themselves but a New Year does not signify the start of that. I'm more along the line of thinking "Just try and keep your shit together, like, all the time".

keeping our shit together

That all sounds really negative and I'm not trying to make that impression. I just hate how frisky everyone gets over resolutions. Sure, I love watching the ball drop and popping champagne on NYE, but its still the same after that. THATS why I've been avoiding it.

But everyone actually needs goals. Especially if you have a seriously green OTTB on your hands.

future event horse right hurr

I also put it off because I really didn't know what 2015 had in store for us. I still don't really know, but I at least I have a real person job with reliable paychecks, and I don't think I'm moving. At least not within the next 6 to 8 months. I would love to go south & leave all this winter fuckery behind for good, but one needs a savings account first.

So with that, my tentative 2015 goals go a little like this....

But seriously. I can't afford more than probably 3 or 4 sanctioned events. maybe not even that considering they cost a cool grand for the whole weekend when its all said and done.

So my plan is to get B out to some local schooling shows early in the year. First show anywhere close to me is in April. So thats the first goal.

First first would actually be to like, RIDE.

Back when I actually showed 

I'm hoping in a few weeks the world will thaw and I can travel to the indoor a few times a week [lets be realistic, once a week] to get some solid jump schooling under our belts.

B is still SUPER UBER green over fences and I havent really done much jumping in oh, about a fucking year.

Once and IF that all happens, I will feel better about spending money on shows.

Hoping to do one schooling show every other weekend. Because who knows how he will behave off the property.

Then my next goal is to make our eventing debut at Midsouth HT. Its always been one of my favorites and its super close to me and at the end of June, so gives us plenty of time to prepare. If thats isn't disastrous, I was hoping to also compete at Champagne Run and Hagyard Team Challenge. I don't know if baby brain will be ready since those are end of the year shows, but I love those events. We might also hit up Jump Start, because also excellent.

With Bacardi, I just want him to stay in the ring and go over most of the jumps without mishap. Maybe later I can nail down more specific goals like, low 30s dressage tests and double clear XCs. But I'm trying to be realistic.

At home, it would be awesome if I could get some real lateral work down pat with him. Also, super clean canter departs. If I could nit pick his trot, it would be to work on maintaining proper carriage for more than half a lap- he tends to get heavy in my hands. I mean, have you seen the set of shoulders on that guy? I would also love to dabble more in his flying changes too.

So to recap
1. Lateral work
2. Proper carraige
3. Canter departs
4. Tentative flying changes

1a. April schooling show-don't die
2a. May schooling shows-more not dying
3a. June USEA show- stay in the ring, no refusals
4a. End of year sanctioned events.

Not a very decisive goals list, but its a start

What Do Wednesday: Vacations

I know what you're thinking. 

Beaches, skiis or other vacationing destinations in winter. But I'm not talking human vacations. Vacations of the equine variety.

Horses be like

I stumbled upon THIS article on FB while trying to distract my brain from not being able to ride and found it interesting and thought provoking and definitely worthy of picking my blogging friends brains.

If you don't feel like or can't for some reason or another (mobile app is weird sometimes) I shall sum it up for you...

Written by the all knowing and godlike, Denny Emerson, this article touches on his life in the earlier years and how its drastically changed for the worse (surprise surprise). Post WWII, apparently EVERYONE gave their horses the winter off because no one could afford to build indoors or travel south. In general, horses got about 2 months off, completely, a year. Northern riders gave their horses the worst parts of winter off. The Southerners would give their horses the worst part of summer off. Denny remarks on how nowadays, it seems most (especially top level horses) are shown 12 months a year, with no real big breaks, with southern migrations being a prominent factor. Obviously not the best thing for horses. He then highlights & generalizes 3 different types of riders and what they have to offer "vacation" wise for their horses and it brings up great points.

-->"There are enormous difference of opinion about what kinds of time off are most beneficial to equine athletes  Some advocate the old fashioned idea of "let him be a real horse..get muddy and dirty...pull his shoes and chuck him in a field for 2 months"
-->"Others advocate keeping horses in some form of constant work 12 months a year...if you were a human athlete in good shape would you go sit in a chair for months?"
--> There are other riders ..who advocate several mini-vacations a year. If a horse has been built up to a peak of fitness...the week following a race or show should be limited work to let the horse recover both physically and mentally, as a way of "recharging the batteries"

 I couldn't really tell if he was more for "mini" vacationing or larger breaks, but I know I formed an opinion based off my opinion and experiences in the sport.

As always, before I officially ask, I have to share my side of WDW.

I go with Option 3.

I've never competed at the peak level of any sport, so I have no real pull in any direction when it comes to a certain level of fitness and performance.

That being said, if I were at the top, I would still have the same opinion.

Even at the lower levels, horses/ riders are learning, schooling and drilling and at some point they need a rest. I know with OTTBs especially, their little brains can explode easily and little bits of downtime can be extremely beneficial in mitigating serious meltdowns. In addition, joint & muscle health is  serious concern at any level!

Even when I was showing pretty regularly (1-2 events a month and schooling shows every weekend) I would ALWAYS give my horse 2 FULL days off after a show, 1 easy day back and then school hard for 2.

I will say though I am NOT a fan of throwing horses out into a field to "just be a horse". I try my damndest in winter to continue some sort of "let down" work going (hacks, long and low flat sessions, trails) and same in winter when the temps soar. Like Denny's article said, you wouldn't take a human athlete and sit them down in a chair for 3 months and then bring them back. The yo-yo-ing of getting in peak form, letting down and coming back., I think is WORSE than staying in relatively good condition all year with "mini" breaks ( in the form of a few days off a week, or a week here and there off). Coming from someone who yo-yo's herself, I can tell you its not the greatest. I am either a fat turd or ripped.

While I wish and dream of GA or FL winters, I know its saving me oodles of cash in travel expenses and boarding costs. I could go on about this topic nd the direction that the sport of eventing is heading, but ya'll would get bored with all the words.

So dear readers, What Do? Specifically, you and your horses, or your general opinions on the 3 different general situations. Do you throw them in a field to chill? Do you try your best to battle mother nature and get some work done? Do you migrate?

Tell me your secrets!

Twiddling Thumbs

Still no real movement over here on the Vollmer homestead. I'm still a fat turd doing nothing but watching Greys. If I didnt have horses to force me outside occasionally, I think I would literally hibernate and not come out till spring.

The weather situation has not improved. Temps rose above an Arctic howl and I was able to at least go outside without a full face mask (YAY POSITIVE SIDE). Also, my hose didnt freeze, thanks to adequate drainage techniques, and I was able to fill the water tank. My heater is in the fritz, but its just keeping me on my toes and in ice chopping shape. Barn door is still frozen shut, and all the cardio going around back, is at least keeping me from becoming a blob.

Still have not ridden.

Oh also Lilly slashed her face. So thats fucking inconvenient.

Plus side of that, did not get her eye. Very plus.

At first I panicked at the sight of it. Beacuse I'm Anxiety Girl. Thankfully Old Mare is quiet and let me examine it closer. She did not let me shave around it thought, and I think it needs stitches. Not sure. Many issues with that type of cut though. Not really sure the skin can be pulled close enough TO stitch. Also, I'm pretty positive everytime she moved her jaw to chew it would pop them anyways. Wounds in winter are very annoying. It doesn't seem to bother her much, which is also a plus. Luckily, I have vet friends that think it was OK to wait to call a vet out, so no emergency vet bill. First thing tomorrow though!

After tending to ancient horsebeast, I did manage to fill some part of my day re-clipping the baby horsebeast.

It was time.

I was reluctant to try, because of the hell we went through the first time. But he was really getting ratchet. I call the re-growth "onion hairs" because they remind me of the uneven and gross hairs that grow off of old onions. And grown out clipped coats are gross.

My hell with him is really nothing, I'm just spoiled with Yankee's behavior. Which is perfect, for the record.

To prevent wide eyed stares, nervous twitches and minor pulling back in the cross-ties I decided it was best to mitigate with food.

JUST STUFF HIS FACE WITH FOOD.

I also noticed that he visibly relaxed when I sang along to my ipod.

So I force fed him treats and rapped sang Lil Wayne to him for an hour and we got it done with no real melt-downs.

"I deserve all your cookiez"

He looks a little ridiculous with only half his face shaved but I cannot STAND goat hairs on the chin. SO I had to at least get the bottom. I really wanted to smooth it out a little more, or get all of his face. But I also do not want a 17.1hh Thoroughbred rearing into the rafters with me so I avoided it to remain alive. Also, with the weather we've ben having, I figured it was more protection for his Princess face.

I actually was very impressed that he was so calm and non spastic for face clipping. In general really, he acted like an adult for once. Perhaps he's learning how to horse after all.

And then he posed for pictures.

I swear to God this horse is THE best poser. I don't know if this had to do with his old owner using him as the subject of her art, or if he just loves the attention, but I can leave him alone, back away and he will strike poses all fucking day.

Majestic as fuck. 

You will notice the adorable bonnet he's modeling. We will eventually be rocking that over some sick stadium courses, but for now we will appreciate Jackie for giving it to me for my birthday.

Its in four days in case you were wondering.

Fresh and fabulous

The Boy has planned an amazing trip to TB for my birthday, and we depart Thurs for 4 days, so I think I will continue to not ride.

Considering its currently spitting ice outside and covering everything the light touches with slick surfaces, I do not think I will even be able to turnout, so riding is out of the question.

I will think of it as a mini vacation inside a vacation for the beast.

Consider that foreshadowing for our next episode of "What Do Wednesday" coming this Wednesday.

Also I hate all of you that have indoors.

Pants Update

So its officially been 7 weeks since my precious Pants left me. I've been prolonging this update because I've been denying that he's really not here.

I could not be happier about where he's gone, dont get me wrong about that! Its just difficult to adjust. He's been by my side for the majority of TEN YEARS. And now he's just gone. Its hard.

However, sad feelings aside, he's doing WONDERFUL!

He settled in with his buddies, Nugget and Huey, like a champ.

Yanks and Nugget

For a few weeks they just hacked him around and let him settle in. I got constant updates and snapchats because I am a nervous nelly of a horse mom. I knew he would be just fine, but I had to be annoying for a little while.

Being precious

They were a little surprised with his spunk, which I worried about at first, but they loved it. he's not your typical "old man: or even OTTB. Hes spunky, but respectful. he just loves his job and wants to show it!

They have 3 horse twins. Can you tell which is Mr. Pants?

They took him for gallops, and did a few flat sessions. He has a massive pasture and is spoiled beyond belief.

And then they took him for his first official dressage lesson!

Peekaboo behind Huey!

They said he was great! A little adjustment time was expected, but they were super stoked with his background in dressage and can tell he knows his stuff.

Well, duh ;)

A few dressage lessons later he's fully settled in and raring to go. I get nothing but positive feedback and love for my boy. For which I am overwhelmed with happiness about!

After a few weeks of flat lessons, they finally took a jump lesson and learned what I was talking about with " the little engine that could".

He LOVES to jump. Its his fucking job and he is a BEAST.

I wish I could show the texts  L sent me about him but I was just like, yeah, sounds like Yankee. Wait till you take him XC!!

After rocking jumping lesson 2!

He even gets to wear fancy tack and be the spoiled King that he is. Please swoon with me...

DROOL MACHINE 

They then informed me after a few jump lessons, that they planned to spend the winter competing at local jumper shows to get some experience with him and leg him up for the first USEA show of the year in March. MARCH!!

Yankee of course, was a true gentleman and scholar and kicked some ass at the show.

For the first time out, 5 weeks weeks after arriving, I couldn't be more happy with the results.

"hello. I'm fabulous"

I wish I could show ya'll the video, but take it from me, it was glorious.

They're already talking about the 2016 season and going 1* and i'm just like, dying, of happiness.

Sub Zero

Well, all the positive vibes I was attempting to send myself in the last post did not work and I spent NYE, NY day and the next 4 days with the stomach flu. That was an unfortunate start to the new year, but, shaking it off, and trying to begin on day 6!

WTF is this shit

Mother nature is making is quite difficult, per usual. Raging bipolar  comes with 50* temp swings  and snow, ice, sub zero actual temps & way below -10ish* windchills.

uh, BRR.

Fri forecast

Can we please note Saturday was almost 60 and it POURED (we got 4 inches of rain, then it froze solid) and now its OH, ONLY 8*? I hate Ohio. Its literally the worst state. I swear. Never move here. At least CO and MN are consistent in the frigidness & there are no surprises.

I would like to point out Wednesday is now forecasted at -5* and Thursday is a chilly -9*, without windchill.

That being said, I am going to remain POSITIVE. Positive things: poop freezes in the cold, and it makes stalls a breeze to clean! Yay. And the barn door freezes shut so you have to put in extra cardio hauling manure buckets and going around to the back of the barn! Woo! Also, its virtually impossible to do anything of real value when the mercury dips below a certain level, so yay netflix!

Also Levi was having a major happy spaz attack and it was super precious.

Perfect dog is perfect

And, adorable snowy pony noses

In addition to all that happy, The Faja and myself bundled up and hit the trails because we are insane woodland people that don't give a fuck about phalanges.

pure badass, dont argue

We might be a little cray, but I was SICK of being cooped up in the house feeling like a useless turd...and fuck mothernature, I will conquer you even if my toes are freezing off!

I did not expect much from "The Baby" (I can no longer really call him this since he is now SIX, but, since he acts like an imbecile 78% of the time, he earns it) today since the windchill was about 0* and he hasnt been worked in over a week, but he was surprisingly good.

One minor major bucking/bolt incident involving a nasty leaf and some sound in the woods, but he recovered quickly and thoroughly enjoyed the ride afterwards. I think.

"Who me? I am a perfect Prince and deserve all the cookies"

 He was really brave and even stepped over a few sticks.

Even old Lilly Belle kicked up her heels and spat out a canter. It was adorable and not at all naughty.

"I too, am perfect in every way and am deserving of all the cookies"

We mostly walked since Lilly hasn't been ridden consistently since Oct and not at all since the end of Nov, but it was a magical and breathtaking.

Literally, I couldn't breathe.

But it was pretty. And we did canter once and trot a few times without mishap. And ya know, pictures.

majestic as fuck

Maybe one day I will get around to a Yankee update or making some 2015 goals, but all my energy is going towards not freezing to death/trying to do something with my life besides binge watch Greys Anatomy.

-20 windchill tomorrow. Neat!

Seriously contemplating hanging up my tack for the winter.