And Just Like That, It Was Gone

OK. I am going to pee my breeches if I don't let the cat out of the bag.

Its really not that exciting to you normal show people, but...*drumroll* I entered Bacardi in his FIRST USEA event ever. EVER.

WOW that only took two years!

The funniest thing about his debut is that I'm not even riding. My trainer is riding him.

Like some insane fitness freak I signed up for a Tough Mudder and it just so happens to be on the same weekend as the cheapest show of the year...and by the time I figured that out, sucked it up and entered B I had paid for the Mudder months before already. If you've never done a Mudder its essentially paying $180 to run 10 miles though mud and cause yourself horrible pain.

I'm insane.

But we knew that.

So anyways, its settled. Hopefully official, but I had issues with Xentry and assigning my trainer as the rider so I had to send it snail mail 4 days before close. *fingers crossed* ((I am actually happy that someone who does this as like, their job, will make his debut with him. A confident, unattached pilot I hope will make his first experience positive, and thats all I want.))

This brings me to my next point.

We recently got our yearly bonuses...

At first I was like...

...and despite the FIVE hundred dollars in taxes, I still had a large chunk to disperse among things. Most went to medical bills, but the rest has disappeared already. Like literally in 6 days.

Culprit: horses.

Damn them!

Grumpy pony

Yankee currently is eating dollar bills so theres that, but Bacardi also recently had what was supposed to just be a health certificate appointment end up being much more than that.

...and then I was like

EME had the vet come out and do all the spring things horses get. Luckily B had his shots last month and his Coggins drawn earlier so I just needed a health cert for the show.

Just a a quick exam and out.

So as my darling vet is taking his temp and listening to his heart, he looks up and goes, "he has left ventricle sideways heart anatomy arrhythmia asthma" and I was like "what the fuck did you just say?"

Ok so he didn't say that, but thats what I heard and my heart dropped and I was like, no, do not say these words to me, I cannot deal with this shit right now. what does this mean. What is happening. Why are all my horses broken

So I calmly say "um, wut"

He then goes, "OH I'M SORRY ( I had just filled him in on Yankee), I didn't mean to scare you. Just means his heartbeat is a little fast and irregular. Happens with racehorses a lot, fit horses, athletes, does he ever tire out?"

And I was like, "no"

So then he explained things and I heard words and barely recovered from that.

After that heart attack, the exam continued and he found some sharp edges on B's teeth and said "Well, we could do it now or wait"

And aside from giggling like a ten year old boy, I said "please tell me what to do, I literally cannot make decisions right now because you've scarred me and its not like I'm not used to throwing money at my horses, so what do I do please"

"I advise we do his teeth now before it becomes a problem"

So we floated the teeths.

And then somehow  while B was drugged and getting floated, we got on the topic of microchips and I was like, "oh yeah I wanted to do that for B since I have one for Yankee, and I know they're not necessary but like, peace of mind. Next time you come out can you remember to bring one? You know, like among the million things vets remember on a daily basis."

And just like that, he pulls out the biggest needle I've ever laid eyes on, like he was ready or some shit, and gave me the questioning look and I was like "why not".

So now B has a chip.

And then he was like, "while he's out want me to clean his sheath?"

I paused, thinking about how much vets might charge for sheath cleaning, but then realized he never lets me do it outside sedatives so I was like "why not".

And thats the tale of how I spent $400 on a $45 health certificate.

Its ok though, I feel better and Bacardi is all spiffy and shiny and ready for his FIRST show.

MAY 7th everyone!